It’s safe to say that this Masturbation Month is unlike any we’ve encountered before. For at least two months, most of the world has been either quarantined or practicing social distancing as part of a global effort to slow the spread of the novel coronavirus. While extended time at home that might seem like a perfect recipe for self-pleasure, the additional stresses of economic insecurity, the public health crisis, and uncertainty of the future have stifled the sex drives of many.
With this in mind, we’ve compiled some accessible tips (including insights from the Chakrubs team) for how to turn yourself on this Masturbation Month.
1. Make time for yourself
It’s easy for time to get away from us when we’re not intentional about how we spend it. Our technological devices are one of our primary forms of connection at the moment and many of us are attached to them from the moment we wake up until we go to sleep. Not only can this lead to information overload or symptoms of electrosmog (foggy headedness, anxiety, dizziness, fatigue, and more), but it also prevents us from being present with ourselves.
Chakrubs’ Managing Editor Danielle Dorsey shares her practice for setting aside personal time.
“I have been experimenting with leaving my phone in a different room while I work and being more mindful about the time I spend on social media. For example, I charge my phone across the room from my bed at night and in the morning I don’t touch it until after I’ve journaled and meditated. This allows me to better tune into how I’m feeling and create reasonable expectations for my day. Taking time away from social media has also made me more aware of how it affects me so when I’m scrolling and something triggers or upsets me, I don’t just numb out and keep scrolling, I disengage and find a more supportive activity.”
2. Bring awareness into your body
Our bodies are supporting us through a collectively traumatic time and now more than ever they need our attention and care. Find small ways to give gratitude to your body and support its health. This could be through mindful eating, massage, or a quick stretch.
Or take Chakrubs’ Founder Vanessa Cuccia suggestion and dance it out!
As she says, “I have taken up randomly dancing in random places in my apartment. Feeling my body and gaining new perspectives. Why not dance on the countertop? Why not on the dining room table? I am seeing what my body feels like from here to there. Communing with my living space inwardly and outwardly.”
3. Indulge yourself without apology
This Masturbation Month is a great time to examine your relationship to restriction and indulgence. Learn to decipher when you are saying no to something because it feels undeserved and when you are saying no to something because it is not right for you.
Chakrubs’ Creative Director Jenny Sotelo shares how she’s been embracing indulgence:
“This extended time at home has allowed me to tune more into my space. I find pleasure in homesteading, caring for my plants, and keeping my space at a high vibration, and in times of stress this grounds me.
“This time has also allowed me to release shame from things I would normally consider indulgent – sleeping in, having a glass of wine with dinner, baking brownies and sweets. I am realizing that often indulgence provides pleasure and a sense of comfort, and I am appreciating the importance of these comforts right now when my nervous system feels unsteady. Why do we put these restrictions on ourselves in the first place? If anything this has shown me that time is mutable, shame and guilt don’t serve you – follow when your body says YES, learn when it’s saying no. Those are really the most important boundaries, and you get to decide them for yourself.”
4. Romance yourself
Elevated mood, decreased stress and tension, increased concentration, pain relief, better sleep, and enhanced immune function are just a few of the benefits of a regular self-pleasure practice. As attractive as all of that sounds, arousing oneself in our current conditions has proved challenging for many. Instead of focusing on the finish line, put more emphasis on the journey of turning yourself on and affirming your right to feel good.
If you’re having trouble getting in the mood, think about how you’d want a new partner to seduce you and try replicating that.
Chakrubs Operations Manager Jessica Irving shares how she’s making the most of this Masturbation Month:
“It feels appropriate that Masturbation Month would come at a time when we’re all quarantined in our homes. If it wasn’t already a month-long celebration of giving yourself orgasms, it surely would be after all this. I often feel like I’ve devoted my whole life to masturbation and pleasure. I wondered what I could do to make May special from the other months of the year. That’s why this May I’ve chosen to focus more on romancing myself rather than just getting myself off. With no one else around, it felt like the perfect time to assume more of the role for myself. Needless to say, date nights at home with myself have been some of the best dates of my life. Turns out, I know what I like."